Gestational diabetes. It was what I was afraid of. I had heard so many bad things about having diabetes while pregnant, so getting the diagnosis hit me really hard.
Around 20 weeks pregnant, baby boy started measuring a bit larger than normal. I also noticed I was gaining a lot of weight, and FAST. My pre-pregnancy weight was right around 180 pounds. Now, at 32 weeks and 2 days I weigh 245 pounds.
I felt like no matter what I did or what I ate, the pounds just kept coming and coming. I started feeling weaker and more tired, and getting very shaky between meals. I had a gut feeling it meant diabetes, but it wasn’t real for me until I got the phone call from my doctor.
Even then, it wasn’t as real as picking up my glucometer and pricking my finger for the first time… I will admit that I was and still am a little bit nervous about that part.
It’s not like I didn’t try. It’s not like I didn’t eat healthy. It’s not like I just sat in bed all day and never moved. I know I didn’t do anything to cause this to happen, yet still I blame myself. I worry about the baby, and what it will mean for him. Will he be born too big? Will he have diabetes or medical issues after birth because of this?
Getting that phone call was a scary one, that I know for sure. But I will not let this stop me. I will not let me fears get the best of me. I know deep down that God has a plan, and this is a part of it. What is meant to happen will happen. What is not, will not. I have faith in that. With only 8 weeks until I am full term, my only option is to stay strong.
XOXO,
Lia
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